|I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb ... and I also know that I'm not blonde. Dolly Parton||You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy. Erica Jong|
|The hardest years in life are those between ten and seventy. Helen Hayes (age 73)||I refuse to think of them as chin hairs. I think of them as stray eyebrows. Janette Barber|
|Whatever women must do, they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult. Char Whitton||My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint. Erma Bombeck|
|When I was young, I was put in a school for retarded kids for two years before they realized I actually had a hearing loss ... and they called ME slow! Kathy Buckley||I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours. Rita Rudner|
|A man's got to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do what he can't. Rhonda Hansome||Every time I close the door on reality it comes in through the windows. Jennifer Unlimited|
|The phrase 'working mother' is redundant. J Sellman||I think, therefore, I'm single. Lizz Winstead|
|If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck? Linda Ellerbee||Thirty-five
is when you finally get your head together and your body starts falling
every successful man is a surprised woman.
base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch.
of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry.
age ain't no place for sissies.
are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.
|In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. Margaret Thatcher|
every successful woman .. is a basket of dirty laundry.
every successful woman ... is a substantial
amount of coffee. Stephanie Piro
|Who ever thought up the word "Mammogram"? Every time I hear it, I think I'm supposed to put my breast in an envelope and send it to someone. Jan King||My
husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't
decide to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives.
is the repetition of unpalatable truths.
Baroness Edith Summerskill
|I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house. Zsa Zsa Gabor|
|I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career. Gloria Steinhem||If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning. Catherine Aird|
|When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. Elayne Boosler||I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once. Jennifer Unlimited|
high heels were so wonderful, men would still be wearing them.
|I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on. Roseanne Barr|
|Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and you cry with your girlfriends. Laurie Kuslansky||A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who never owned a car. Carrie Snow|
click button to: